Slowly you are becoming an emotional dust bin

 Of late i realized, people don't like you or be happy to be with you. People either are with you for their emotional needs of just because they like to dump all their emotional garbage upon you. No one would get some one as sincere and passionate as you who would listen to them, who would provide a shoulder to cry upon and a company to cry together. 

I know I never realized my worth and so every time I have been used because it is easy for anyone to make a emotional fool when you know u are in a wrong perception that you are loved whereas its their way to fool you showing the other side as how sweet is to make a person to be unloved and yet make them love hard. 

Knowing all yet............ I live in an self created illusion that I am worthy...and one day my feelings will be understood

Unloving the Valentine

 

THE  Valentine's week began.  As I waited for the hugs and kisses and lot more.. But roses never came. The craziest thing was "Farzi wala Luv u". Eery time you want to avoid from being caught with the truth about the relation Farzi wala Luv u Pops.  up. Of course it hurts. Probably..it's wonderful to love someone that unlove  you.

As usual days are not for me. Life rests in the fingertips and Whatsapp status. Perfectly super busy schedules exposes the first appearance ....4 am the coolest ever sounding "Happy Valentine's Day"  with the one you actually love.

Wonder why Krishna  and Radha  were inseparable and the love divine…..The sage explained Rukmini made Krishna  a husband, Meera made him God and it was Radha alone who let him remain  who he is  i.e., Krishna... what a consolation—“Loving that unloves you?”. The self pity loomed over me  and till the end I consciously waited ...perhaps unmeant words that might mean!

But time was harsh. The wishes were never meant for me from someone who is not mine. Wonderfully packed behind the corner of my heart I consoled "Life is beautiful when you know how to love the people that unlove you"

With a determination to steal all the love time and attention from the one that unlove’s  you,   I moved on waiting for another voyage in search of a true Valentine’s Day wish….

The Pademic...and lockdown dairies

We started rigorously beating the plates with spoons and tumblers with sticks -- the sole motive was to do away with the pandemic. Corona situation worsened and years passed. The world became enclosed in your finger tips. Your friend and family was nothing but the smartphone became not only  your real life partner but your dictator, ruler, and of course the owner of your mind. 

The child who u prohibited from using the smart gadget has become solely dependent on the phone. So, is the human race becoming the slave of technology or are they slowly heading towards a psychic world where clubhouses, virtual chat rooms and whats app messages formed an integral part of life than those humanly interactions and coffee house gossips. 

No matter it is a necessity and we are left with no options. But isn't human race slowly creating a mechanical world in a life filled with machines and gadgets????

Emotions are no longer predominant. With thousand of corpses burning at the same furnace at the same time aren't the human race slowly forgetting to be humane or are they slowly moving towards a robotic environment with no humanly emotions....

Yet to actually get the results...Corona still persists and we are no longer the same as we were a decade before... how long????

I am under severe depression, I wish I could overcome the trauma I am undergoing. I wish I have the shoulder to cry who have promised me to be by the side for a lifetime. I am struggling to live till I hear again 

I am breaking every passing moment. Trying to console myself. Trying all these just because of us. Just because I want our promises to be with us... keep us  together above everything. I trust u more than my life

difficult decision

I know it is not only difficult but a tough decision to take whether i should continue to live or i should cease to live. Are relations important or my life. i ought to live and that too live with a dignity.

The DP....

Morning when I saw your whats app Profile... I was shocked to see that you have changed your DP. was it on public demand or???Another answer I struggle to find.